Bankruptcy and Post Punk... - 25/09/08

So I am not going to presume to be an expert on any of this, but something really rankles as I watch from across the pond as the Bush administration scurries to put a band aid on the slashed carotid artery that once was the American economy. I'm struck by a few things, and will present them in no particular order:

1) George W. Bush was touted as the first president coming into office with a Masters in Business Administration. Does it strike anyone else as ironic that under his stewardship, as guided by the principles of anti-regulation and Laissez-Faire policies, the economy has done a bigger nose dive than when Evel Knievel took his jump over the fountains at Caesar's Palace?

2) With great Fanfare, the "Personal Responsibility Brigade" reformed Personal Bankruptcy Laws in 2005 because it was believed that too many people were living irresponsibly beyond their means and then using Chapter 7 or Chapter 13 Bankruptcy in order to get out of the obligations that their profligate lifestyles had yoked them with. The Bernanke/Paulson Parachute, as I understand it, would have the US government buy up the bad debt of US Banks (who bought and sold loans and created and trafficked in bad financial instruments irresponsibly), freeing them (from their obligations to their debt and) allowing them to go about their business. Hmmm...

3) Republicans deplore Socialism. For most of them, it's worse than telling off-color jokes in front of their mothers or saying, "Thanks, but I'm really just not that big a fan of Apple Pie." So does anyone see the great turning gears of universal irony in a Republican Administration putting in place the single biggest piece of de facto socialism in the United States since Roosevelt's WPA?

4) Finally, too many words, not enough media makes for a dull post. Here's a music video for a buddy of mine's band, The Scotchgreens. The song's called "Professional". The lead singer, Zander Cox, and I used to hang -- when we could both count our ages on one hand. Listen for my favourite line: "And through this world I've wandered,/ I've seen a lot of evil men./ Some will rob you with a pistol,/ Others with a pen."

Jon Stewart - 22/09/08

If I could say it or do it any better than Jon Stewart, I would. But I can't, so I won't.

election 2008 conspiracy theory #1 - 06/09/08

So, you're John McCain and through a strange degree of cunning, luck and providential serendipity, you find yourself the Republican Nominee for President of the United States of America. At 72 you can hardly believe your luck.

Now how to win? Easy, find the perfect VP. So you have some ideas: Tom Ridge, a fairly respected former governor of Pennsylvania who then became the first head of the Department of Homeland Security. Or there's your long time buddy from across the political aisle: Joe Lieberman, the Connecticut senator who shares a home-party-bucking personality streak almost as big as your own. Either of them would be solid choices to appeal to that all important American political constituency: the Independent.

Problem is: they're both baby killers. Yup, these two guys support a woman's right to choose what she does with her own body. So do you. But it is that fact that drives people in your own party into an apoplectic, mouth foaming rage.

So then how do you appeal to them and not get yourself heckled out of your own nominating convention? You chose a Pro-Life, Pro-Gun, pro-God, "the World is NOT warming so stop complaining and let's drill us some oil" Anti-Sex Education Mother of a 17 year old carrying Her Hockey Boyfriend's Happy Accident. So this woman is the perfect political coup de grace. With one fell swoop you bring back into the fold the disaffected conservatives who hate your guts because you're not conservative enough (but boy is she!) and the disaffected women who are heart broken that the first female candidate for the president had been upstaged by the first successful black candidate.

Man, this one is in the bag!

But then you wake up a week after your 72nd birthday, one that would make you the oldest first term president in the history of the job, and you start to worry.

Why were they so excited about this woman who is so different from you? Why did the people who have said all through the campaign these past two years how much they hate you absolutely fall all over themselves for this bible thumping mother of 5?

A heartbeat away from the presidency. That's what everyone keeps saying. Oh Jesus! Now it all makes sense: the only way conservatives could keep hold of the White House is if they elect an independent who'll appeal to people upset by what Dubya's done for 8 years. But then they select the old war hero whose too old to be around too long if he gets elected (or the CIA can take him out when Karl Rove and Grover Norquist tell them to) and then we've got the next Reagan in the White house without having to try too hard or acknowledge the fact that the last 8 years really have sucked.

Oh John, what have you got yourself into?

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